Why Lizzo Is So Important
Today while I was hot boxing, Lizzo’s new hit “Juice” came on the radio and I turned that shit the fuck up. I belted every song line, did a little dance, and felt the smile on my face grow bigger and bigger with ever lyric I spat. Now those that know me know I’ve been a Lizzo fan for a minute but there’s just something about her becoming main stream that has me jumping for joy.
I think it has to do with the fact that there aren’t many Lizzos in the world: fat, sexy, Black women just owning the fuck out of their bodies. She is just being herself and making bomb ass music that I can bop to. As a fat, Black and -dare I say- sexy woman, myself, I can dig some Beyoncé, Rihanna, Sza, or whomever else but when a Lizzo song comes on, it just feels like it’s for me. When Lizzo says “no I’m not a snack at all look baby I’m the whole damn meal” I feel that shit!!! When she belts the seductress lines of Lingerie, I’m taken back to those nights when I’m lying in bed in my Adore Me panty set smoking a bowl and snapping dirty pics to my suitors. And of course, you can always find me doing my hair toss, checking my nails, and looking GOOD AS HELL! (When I wear a wig that is).
Lizzo validates me in a way: I’m listening to music by someone who actually represents me and suddenly my entire body feels like it has space in the world.
And something about her becoming main stream amplifies that. It’s similar to the feeling I assume people will get when there are more ugly people on tv: (read the post before freaking out) it’s not just about me being comfortable being me but others are out there listening and dancing to this music too and realizing that people like me can exist and be sexy outside of the late night Lane Bryant commercials. Lizzo is a pioneer. (Tokyo Vanity too!!!)
Yes Adele and Megan Trainer are all about that bass but sometimes it feels like being a fat Black woman puts me at the bottom of the motherfucking barrel, so it’s nice to see a shift in the perceived paradigm. And that’s exactly how I feel.
Benefits of a Mental Diet on Our Individual Growth
You Are What You Eat
You are what you eat: this is a statement I heard a lot growing up. Eat a bunch of donuts and you will be slow and lethargic. Eat some celery and carrots, and you’ll have the ability to do magical things. Not really, but you’ll be more focused, remember shit with ease, and will be able to see better. Everyone always talks about the benefits of a physically palatable diet but no one ever talks about the benefits of a mental diet.
Defining A Mental Diet
A mental diet is defined by the editing what you expose your brain to. Eat a lot of shit and you feel like shit doesn’t just apply to food. If all you watch on television is ratchet reality television and all you read is Donald trump tweets and if all you listen to is American Top 40, this is the equivalent to eating nothing but fast food your whole life.
Time begins to addresses this concept slightly in their online article entitled “Social Media Is Making You Stupid.” The article states, “[Social networking] could be making you dumber by supplying answers and insights without requiring any actual thinking, so that your analytic powers begin to waste away like an unused muscle.” Not only are we not exercising our brains when we spend all of our time on social sites but on top of that, my theory is the more we indulge in entertainment and neglect other aspects of our brain, the more we stunt our mental and personal growth. If you aren’t eating your vegetables and instead gorge on nothing but Hot Cheetos and honey buns, don’t be surprised when you have greasy hair and a smelly vagina. It’s time to trim the fat…and the sugar
A Balanced Mental Diet
A balanced mental diet consist of all the parts of the food group.
You have your veggies: self help materials. Self help materials include anything that has you reflect on yourself and your growth as an individual. Self help books, psychiatry podcasts, motivational speeches, etc. these things, like your kales and your carrots, are essential to ingest on a regular basis. How can you grow as a person if you’re never reflecting upon yourself and opening your eyes to your flaws and ways in which you can improve upon them? (Personally, I suggest Mark Manson’s The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, it’s like the spinach of brain veggies…I’m a big fan of spinach).
Fruits: fruits are sweeter. They share many of the same benefits of veggies but our bodies like them better for some reason that a scientist would know. Your mental fruits are your self love materials. I make a distinguish between self help and self love because self help is to look at yourself from a critical lens and to dissect what makes you tick, hoping to fix it. Self love on the other hand is just living you for you. Yes you are growing as a person but you need to love yourself at every single stage in that process.
Good carbs: good carbs aren’t as great as the chips and the pastas but they’re still pretty tasty and they’re necessary to our development. This is where the politics come in. we have to understand our place in this world and in order to do that we have to understand the world. Brush up in your current events, understand what these politicians are up to and ways that you can use your voice to change the narrative in whatever level that may appear. Politics are carbs because yes it’s super important but too much of this shit and you’ll drive yourself crazy.
Protein: learning new things. We have to take the time to add something new. Growing means exposing yourself to knew things in the world. Take a dance class, learn French, finally master trigonometry. Not only is it never too late to learn something new, it is mandatory. Life is short so expand your bubble!!
Sweets and Fats: And now we have our sweets. Go on and indulge in that Kardashian whatever. These are sweets and fats because these things do not nourish you. No matter how you look at it, you’ll never gain too much from anything on VH1 except the same sick satisfaction that a Snickers gives you.We always need that little pick me up. Go ahead and eat your Snickers but know when to stop.
Conclusion
At the end of the day, we are all trying to improve ourselves. Being the best possible version of yourself does not start and stop with your bank account or your physical appearance. It starts with our brains and our mentality. We can only accomplish what our minds are willing to allow us to push for and if our brains are stuck on stupid then we will be too. No one is perfect. I watch enough Netflix and Hulu to fill a whole twenty-four hour period without stopping but it’s a process. We try Keto, Paleo, and all the other diets to keep our bodies healthy, how about we try something for our minds?
Question for my readers:
I didn’t include religion because I’m still figuring all that shit out for myself but I acknowledge that it should be somewhere. Where do you think religion or spirituality would fit in the mental diet? I don’t think I get enough comments to be asking questions but 🤷🏿♀️ gotta shoot my shot!
Television Needs More Ugly People-And Here’s Why
The Role of Television and Visual Media in Our Society
I am a strong believer that television and other visual forms of media are as important as literature. They are a form of art that imitates reality. As with any art, not only does television imitate our reality but it always adds a learning component whether it’s moral, satirical, societal, or what have you. TV is the reason why I know to do “pizza shape, French fry shape” with my skis even though I’ve never been skiing. Television shows and movies are fundamental in our understanding of society and how to be functional members of said society.
(Stole this off of the South Park website)
This is the exact reason why it’s fucked up that there aren’t many ugly people given representation and when they are the majority of the time they are written to have mean, insignificant, pathetic, or sinister personalities.
Let’s Unravel This.
First off, please try not to be offended by the term “ugly” because it’s a term that our society came up with to define anyone who is not conventionally attractive. Can these people be attractive? Well as a fat person who definitely doesn’t fall into the category of conventionally attractive, I vigorously nod my head and say, yes of course! But there will always be the tiny part deep down inside that still doubts that. There are many factors that come into play to create the mini me full of doubt but visual media plays a big role.
With all of the lessons that TV and movies teach and the things that they normalize, in often cases it is not always media mirroring reality but reality mirroring media, with people becoming more empathetic to others based on what they see in the media. Brian’s Song brought along a new wave of individuals questioning their racism. Ellen opened up the door for homosexuality, pushing people to question their beliefs on the subject. The Fosters gave voice to the hearing impaired, reminding audiences that there needs to be space for these individuals.
Visual media teaches compassion and shows us how to treat people so when the main character isn’t ever visually unappealing it sends the wrong message. It tells us these people don’t matter.
In the Netflix original Stranger Things, everyone was so hellbent on finding that little boy who got lost. You had a whole town of folk searching in the dead of night for this adorable little boy but what about Barb? Barb, played by Shannon Purser, isn’t exactly what our society deems gorgeous. I’m not saying that she’s extremely unattractive (because she is far from that) but she is more likely to win “most likely to succeed” than “best hair.” And look what happened to Barb? She went missing in the same fucking town as that boy and no one said a little bo-peep! Not even her fucking parents looked for her, like huh?! If she were a size two with Estée Lauder skin then maybe people would give a shit!
(I stole this pic from Yahoo View)
Even when unconventional individuals play a role in these TV shows and movies they still check off some box. They may be fat but it’s in all the “right places” so they are “good fat.” They may be nerdy but they’re “cute nerdy.” So all of the lessons that surround characters of “all sizes” or looks is still fit with the asterisk of, as long as they are attractive.
The Role In Our Real Lives
The lack of representation does hinder the way we view people in real life. To this day I still see magazines about JonBenet Ramsey, that adorable girl that went missing in 1745 (hyberbole: it was 1996) but every year there’s an update in her mysterious story. Now don’t get me wrong, what happened to her is tragic and it’s good that we do not let her name die but like….why her? What about the countless others who have vanished without a trace? What makes this little girl immortal? And I’m telling you, it’s the media.
We love attractive people. We love them to the point where no one and nothing else matters and it’s harmful to our society. Even Ted Buddy got as far as he did because people found him sexy. In a different post I’ll definitely talk about my theory as to why we are so fixated on making attractive people the stars of everything but regardless of the reason it needs to stop. Art imitates life and life imitates art and people really be out here thinking that ugly people don’t matter. People really be out here only helping and being kind to individuals that they find attractive.
A life shouldn’t add value or decrease in value based off of visual appearance!!
It’s fucked up and it’s selfish and it’s something that was taught which means it’s something that can be untaught. Let’s unteach it.
Being a Boston Bitch Made Me a Feminist
The Introduction
So a few years ago when I was a junior in college, I attended Blackout. If you are unfamiliar with the festivities, Blackout is an event held at UMass Amherst where all the students of color from campuses all across the lands gather for a weekend of boozing, twerking, and just soaking in all of the Black that is lacking from their respective schools. So a couple of girlfriends and I got all decked out: heels, short skirts, skin lathered in cocoa butter and hair sealed with coconut oil and we went out. It was a great time. I was lit as fuck. I had just finished an entire special brownie and I was just at that stage where I could feel my eyes beginning to turn red and my grip on my current world grow shaky.
A couple of guys came over: “Hey miss, looking good,” one purred as he eyed us up and down. My friends and I ignored him and I continued on my ascend to the higher place. “Yo, why you do my mans dirty like that, where y’all from?” I hazily remember the other guy asking. Still no response. “Oh I know where y’all from, y’all from Boston. I should of smelled that shit right away. All y’all Boston bitches are the same…” one of them said before they trailed off.
To this day, that encounter has stayed with me. Boston bitches.
Being a Boston Bitch
Not only have I grown to accept that I am a Boston Bitch, but I also accept that I have no choice but to be one.
I’m a Boston Bitch because when I walk down the streets of Chinatown late at night I square my shoulders and wear my mean mug like an expensive bag.
I’m a Boston Bitch because I don’t speak Kreyol in Mattapan Square and I don’t speak English in South Bay.
I’m a Boston Bitch because my voice grows some base when I’m ordering food at any restaurant in Roxbury.
And I’m a Boston Bitch because these things and many more are on auto pilot, to the point where loser guys can cat call me on my way to high heaven and I won’t even notice.
What Does This Have to Do With Feminism?
Every single action that I and many women I know do is done not out of spite but out of our own protection from the dangers of men.
A walk down a dark street and a smile can mean rape, death, or both.
An acknowledged “hello beautiful” in shared language or even English could mean being stalked for five blocks until the cops are called.
A voice without base at certain restaurants is a voice that never gets heard.
A Boston Bitch is a woman who has mastered the art of survival.
There are a lot of definitions of “feminism” that float around, causing women (and men) to have to determine where they stand. Let me be perfectly clear: I am a feminist. I am a believer in the political, economic, personal, and social equality of all sexes.
I am a feminist because this world is filled with dangers and injustices both visible and “invisible” -to those that it does not effect-and because of this, a regular day in the life of a woman is to be a Boston Bitch or a Seattle Slut or a Harlem Hoe or a California Cunt.
It becomes second nature and even as second nature it still does not fully protect against the dangers that lurk. I’ve still had a man follow me for three blocks just to grab my ass and I’ve still had Uber drivers who refuse to bring me to my destination until I give them my phone number. According to an article by MarketWatch, “America is the tenth most dangerous place for women to live and ties with Syria as the third most dangerous place for women in regards to sexual violence.” Being a Boston Bitch is just baseline. We have to do more as a community to protect our women. On top of that, we need to change the way we teach our young boys to view and value women. I don’t know what kind of world we are living in but change needs to come and it needs to come soon. In the meantime, this is your favorite Boston Bitch signing off.
How To Finally Keep Your New Year Resolution
The Problem With Resolutions
So it’s that time of year again! The time of year where we don our sparkly gay apparel, kiss our loved ones at the strike of midnight and vow to travel more, join that kickboxing class, run that marathon, start our business, and so on and so fourth screaming “Happy New YearS” to all the passerby. Yes, t’is the motherfucking season. The problem with these New Year resolutions is they usually give way mid February. We stop getting to work a half an hour early, forgo the quinoa, and those five am runs become a thing of the past. And before we know it, we’re right back to where we were December 31st of the year before.
According to Business Insider, 80 percent of New Year’s resolutions fail each fucking year. That’s insane. But I mean, this information is nothing new, right? Instagram and Facebook shame us everyday with memes about making and breaking new year resolutions. “Keep that shit to yourself!” your favorite influencers post and we all chuckle right along, feeling stupid for having made them in the first place.
But that’s where we are wrong. One should always embrace goals and personal growth so why wouldn’t the start of a new year signal an opportunity to start fresh and achieve something that we have always wanted to do?
So Let’s Keep That Resolution
Let’s actually keep our resolution by making a new resolution.
This year’s resolution is to treat every last day of each month like it’s December 31st and every first day of each month like it’s January 1st.
December 31st is always the day to reflect, to think about our lives through a critical lens: am I where I wanted to be at this time last year? What goals did I accomplish? What surprises (good or bad) occurred? How have I overcome adversity? What am I still unsatisfied by? From this reflection, we come up with our new big goal or “resolution” as well as a plan on how to achieve said resolution. Then we celebrate our successes, wake up on January 1st and begin executing our goal, hearts and minds feeling revitalized and full of motivation: “this is the year that I fucking crush it,” we say.
Now imagine those same actions and that same feeling every single month.
What if at the end of January-January 31st we sit down and reflect on our month, analyze it from a critical lens: asking ourselves, how did we do this month? Celebrating our accomplishments, making a plan for the next month, waking up February 1st with that same New Year’s day drive to do the things we said we were going to do. If we did this every month, where would we be in relation to our goals?
In Conclusion: Stay Motivated
Now having a “new year” every month is just one way of going about it: you can also do this same concept once a week or fuck it, once a day. But basically, don’t give up on you and your goals. There’s this quote: “Motivation is like a shower, you gotta do it daily.” Now although this quote doesn’t really go with the resolution of monthly resolutions (I hope we are all showering more than once a month) the concept still stands. Creating a resolution isn’t “corny” or “useless” or whatever else social media has led you to believe. It’s a great way to grow and actually be the person you want to be. It’s about not giving up and keeping that same energy as the year gets harder. Congratulating the progress you make and forgiving yourself when you fuck up.
Dying Happy: A Conundrum
The site works better if you start here.
So I recently attended a wake for the brother of a coworker of mine. The deceased was a young man of the mere age of 24. He died in a hiking incident in which he fell off a cliff and to his death. Prior to the wake all I could think of was the negative: I mean shit-imagine hanging out with your friends doing something you’ve done your whole life and then just….not coming home.
But then again, isn’t that a good thing?
At the wake, I shook hands with his beautiful mother and I hugged my co worker, our chest as close as they could be as I tried to absorb just a modicum of his despair. “Take all the time you need,” I told me coworker. “I’ll be back to work on Monday.” He responded.
I was so taken aback I didn’t reply. Back on Monday? I thought. That’s not nearly enough time to wipe the snot out your nose. Apparently my coworker said he will be returning to work soon despite everyone’s plea that he take more time because “that’s what his brother would have wanted.” His brother had the opportunity to do what he loved all of the time and although that was the way he died, it was an ideal way, and my coworker loved our job and wanted to spend any moment he could at work because you never know how much time you have left.
And that’s the truth: as cliched as this seems, the one promise that this life has to offer to anyone or anything is death so it really is up to us to surround ourselves only in what makes us happy.
But also, that if it’s a double edged sword?
What if because we know we only have this one life we stop appreciating the average day to day and instead chase this concept of happiness to the point where we don’t even realize that we are doing the things that make us happy?
Two sides of the Happy Coin
I drove to the wake with one of my managers and in the car we discussed relationships. We both agreed that although at this particular moment in our lives we do NOT want a relationship with anyone, we are constantly looking for one. Why do we keep looking? Well because Rhonda in HR just got married and Boss Lady Barbara is engaged and Jamal from Accounting has been married 25 years and they are all so…”happy.” So, what if my manager and I think we are happy but we are not? What if we could be happier with a significant other? Right now at the ripe old age of 25 I am not in the mood to deal with someone else’s shit: I work hard at work because I’m ambitious, I work hard at home because there’s no other choice, and in my free time I like to stuff my face full of high sodium Lunchables and drink wine out of a bottle in my panties and a t-shirt. Although I’m sure having a little boo thing next to me while I wipe snot off my nose with the bottom of my shirt and weep to another episode of Ugly Betty would be nice but it’s not exactly what I truly want. That being said, I still have every Tinder meets Bagel while Cupid searches for Fish app that the world has to offer. My “fomo” as the kids call it keep me in a constant state of searching for happiness instead of simply enjoying what I have at the moment.
I think as humans we are too insatiable.
Nothing is never enough and believe you me it has served us well over the centuries. Could you imagine where we’d be if people where like, who needs horses we can just walk all the time to all destinations! Or if the people who make, I don’t know, roller coasters were all, safety belts? Psht! We good! It’s conflicting because in this sense and in many others the thing that makes us want to keep improving and discovering new ways to be happy is a great thing.
The Lesson, I Guess
I’m just saying we need to be able to understand that happiness comes in many forms and those forms look differently for all people and their multiple stages in life. Right now I am happy with my Netflix and Nachos but maybe tomorrow I will want a little shorty by my side. Right now, you may be satisfied taking the bus but tomorrow you will want a car. I’m not ashamed of my Lunchables and you shouldn’t be ashamed of the bus. My coworker’s brother loved to hike so while we can comfort ourselves in saying, he died doing what he loved, I don’t know if HE knew how much he loved it. Did he ever take the time to say, I’m so happy right now and just be alive? Or was he too busy searching for the next thing? We need to find the happy medium between improving our lives while enjoying exactly what makes us happy in the moment. We need to take a moment and just…be happy.
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The Problem with Prayer
Let’s Talk Prayer
So my mother is sick- and I’m not talking cough cough here’s some Robitussin and some Campbell soup. I’m talking frequent visits to the hospital, can’t leave the house, eats food from a blender kind of sick. The kind of sick that cashiers at Walgreens ask you for money to help find the cure. Yeah, that kind of sick. She no longer leaves the house aside from doctor’s visits or hospital visits and can no longer take care of her herself or her household. Now tonight, I had about fourteen people come to my mother’s house for an hour and a half long prayer session. They all marched in like the Christian soldiers they are and started praying immediately. This was that kind of prayer that vibrates through the house: voices carrying upstairs into the attic and straight out of the roof as they ascend to heaven.
Now, don’t get me wrong, although I don’t identify as a Christian, I am definitely a lover and believer of God and all the amazing wonderful Blessings that God brings. That being said, I have an issue with prayer. Here are FOURTEEN people standing in my kitchen: arms spread wide, lifting my mother, her illness, and our whole family in prayer. Fourteen people who walked through this door and greeted her, not as a stranger but as a friend, a co worker, a neighbor. Fourteen people who knew my mother from various locations, before she got sick. Yet, the only time I see any of these people are on nights like tonight when they lift her up in prayer for an hour and a half and head on on their merry ways saying “God bless you and all the people that help to care for you.”
The Problem with Prayer Lies in This
The problem with prayer is that whole “I’m praying for you/let me come pray for you” bit. Not because people are physically doing the prayer, not because of who they are praying to, and not even because I have fourteen people crowding my kitchen at 8pm.
The problem I have is that this is ALL people do.
When you are sick, when you are well, when things go wrong, people pray. And let me tell you: prayer is the bees knees because God is the bees knees (…and the rest of the body. Not that God is a bee I’m just saying God is awesome) but that’s not the only thing in our wheelhouse to do. Whether you believe in my God or your God when you are praying you are praying to good. You are channeling your version of good epitomized and asking that good to reign down blessings on you or whomever you are praying for. Now very RARELY do people pray and act. My God comes from the Christian Bible and in this Bible there are like a gazillion examples of people who are blessed by God. Moses with the freeing of the Israelites, David with the killing of Goliath, Rachel in finally getting pregnant- the list goes on and on. But in these Biblical examples and all the other ones, these people don’t just pray they fucking DO. They got down and dirty and did shit to help their situations or to help the people that they wanted God to bless. Could you imagine where the Israelites would have been if Moses stayed in his fucking farm land when he saw that bush burning and just prayed?
But he didn’t, he got up and did something.
Back to my house. Here, I have fourteen people in my house who see the condition that my mother is in and not a one has taken her to a doctors visit, cooked her a meal, done her hair, even purchased her a pen from the dollar store. Nothing but a prayer.
With Prayer There Must Be Action
Don’t sit around just praying for yourself. And don’t you dare get in your car travel all the way to someone’s house just to pray. Prayer is a connection to good. It is you asking the greatest power of good to aid in a situation. And that greatest power of good can be telling you, hey- I want YOU to be the one to help! That power of good can be out there delegating and has decided that it wants YOU to use whatever tool you have to solve the problem. Moses was a great leader so when he prayed for the safety and well being of the Israelites he got off his ass and helped lead them to safety.
I’m not saying all Christians and people who pray should be it here parting Red Seas and making commandments but shit, action speaks louder than words! When you ask ANYONE for something you still gotta do shit. You can’t ask the guy at the bank for a loan and not have a plan of how you’re gunna give him his money back. You can’t ask for a cuter hairstyle without going to the salon or buying the hair dye from Hair Stop. No matter what you are asking of someone you still have to have SOME action behind the ask. Sooooo why do some of us think it’s okay to go to the source of all things good and just…ask? No action-not a step!
All I’m saying is, if you’re going through it, do your prayer but also, do something else. It doesn’t take much to go to the grocery store or help someone mail a letter. The littlest things make a huge difference.
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High Thoughts
The Power of Our Minds
I think it’s important for us to start off by discussing the power of our mind.
So I don’t know how tv savvy you are but there’s this old Simpsons episode and although I’m a TV guru I can’t for the life of me remember which episode this is from. But anyway, somehow we end up in Lisa’s mind and she’s having this conversation with herselves. And no, that’s not a typo-like for instance writing be instead of been- she was actually having a conversation with multiple Lisas. I believe in this episode the different Lisas were representative of the ID, the Ego and the Super Ego, a Freudian model of the psych. This model basically showcases how there are three versions of you: the you who wants to just do whatever whenever, the you who is organized and thinks realistically, and the you who focuses on the good vs the bad and trying to get you to do good. Now I got my definitions from a skim of Wikipedia so please go there if you’re expecting this to be an in-depth explanation of Freud’s theory. I’m out here using that as a jumping off point.
I think there’s more than just three versions of us: three Lisas of the brain arguing over what decision real life Lisa is going to make. I think that there’s at least five or six versions of us that live up in our mind waiting for their time in the sun. Now, I’m not talking United States of Tara where one version of us takes over our whole body but I’m talking more of a dinner party. Yes here comes another analogy (high me loves these things).
The Dinner Party
Ok so imagine you’re at a dinner party filled with different versions of you: there’s the critical you, the angry you, the lonely you, the happy you, the horny you, and all of the other dwarves. Now just like at a real dinner party there’s going to those one or two people that love to talk and when you give them enough attention, they will take over the whole conversation not leaving anyone room to speak.
So here you are at your dinner party with these different versions of you. Like any dinner party, it’s awkward at first: everyone is just acquaintances, their only real connection being you. So they smile awkwardly at each other, making small talk, waiting for the waiter to finally bring those bread sticks he promised fifteen minutes ago. It’s up to you to break the ice and to start the conversation. So you turn to one of those versions: let’s say the critical you, and Critical You is far from nice. You guys talk and as you talk and give Critical You attention, they take up more and more airtime to the point where you forget the other players are there. Happy You tries to interject: “hey, that’s harsh! You’re great, don’t listen to them!” But it’s too late because you’ve been listening to Critical You for so long that that’s the only voice you can really hear.
Now in actuality the point of this dinner party is so that all voices get equal airtime and can influence you in a way that will only be positive and growth driven but because you are giving Critical You or Emotional You or Horny You more airtime, the rest kind of dwindle away and when you have your next dinner party, maybe Introspective You doesn’t show up, you never pay them much mind anyway. Then Political You “can’t find a baby sitter” and Confident You is “working late” and before you know it, your latest dinner party has become an intimate dinner for two: for you and Critical You-how lovely.
Essentially, we feed into our own thoughts. You think you’re not good enough because you’re only listening to the version of you who thinks you’re not good enough. Maybe this version of you spent a lot of time hanging out with your parents and seventh grade bully so their opinion is warped so technically you shouldn’t be listening to them anyway, but here you are.
What does this have to do with being high?
So in our introduction to the site we discuss how conversations can go to different levels and how being high takes you through these levels quicker and before you know it you’re on a level where you’re discussing your place in this multi-verse.
These conversations can be had with others but they start with yourself. If you’re having a conversation with yourself while high and going through the levels it definitely steers the conversation a certain way and effects if you even make it to in depth levels. If you’re having a conversation with Horny You and you ask them, why am I on this earth? They’re going to say, to procreate! God never intended for man to be tied down let’s give Him what he wanted and go fuck. And just like that you’re that person who goes around saying, “I get so horny when I’m high”
Of course you get horny when you’re high if y’all have a table for two at the restaurant! It’s the only voice you’re hearing and you won’t make it far with them.
Tip for the future:
At your next dinner party (whether it’s high or sober), turn to someone you haven’t heard from in a while and say what’s up. If you look around and you’re at a table for two, quietly excuse yourself and slip out the back door, texting Happy You to see how they’ve been.